You are an Ocean

*** Disclaimer: The contents of this website are mine personally and do not reflect any position of the U.S. government or the Peace Corps. ***

A day will come

When you will look at yourself

In the mirror and marvel at

How wonderful it is,

How exquisite it is,

To be completely devoid

Of the sadness

Of the loneliness

That once clung to your skin

Like salt to an open wound.

 You have grown so much

Because you have quietly realized

You aren’t just teardrops

You are an ocean.

  • Nikita Gill

There’s nothing as soothing for the soul as the relentless ebb and flow of salty waves on a briny beach. There is no sound more calming, no sight more stunning than sunlight glittering off the frigid waters that roil roughly in an effort to prove their very wildness. My cure for a hurting soul is a trip to the shores of the Mother City. To pass hours meandering along Sea Point Promenade or climbing my way up one of the majestic mountains that crest open to nearly 360-degree ocean views.

One year ago I was supposed to be here. I was set to return to the city for an amazing long weekend after my magical introduction. But that didn’t happen. Because a year ago I ended up in California crawling my way through the bitter darkness and overwhelming anxiety of the aftermath.

This trip is a triumph. That a year later I can surface above the crashing waves and bask in even the waning heat of late fall sunshine. That I can journey through public spheres so confidently, weaving my way in and out of throngs of people joling their way through the holiday weekend without succumbing to general fear of the crush. This trip is a landmark. It signifies the extent to which I’ve let go of oppressive anxiety and highlights the precarious nature of emotive states, how caring for yourself is a lifelong journey.

It’s also blissful. I’ve embraced my inner tourist and focused on an epic and extended holiday. A week full of walking, biking, flying, and basking in the miraculously summery weather along the southern coast of Africa.

Maybe it’s the ocean that’s healing, maybe it’s the yogic state of relaxation, or maybe it’s just the decision to “treat yo self”. Either way, the Mother City never fails to provide a magical adventure.

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